I'm just being me

Happy Deepavali 2018!! — November 7, 2018

Happy Deepavali 2018!!

Yup… It’s that time of the year again….

And who can forget ๐Ÿ˜‹

Tell me which other Festival allows us to gorge on sweets and light stuff with fire?

(P.S. Halloween is the closest thing with sweets but no fireworks, Christmas… maybe but the ๐ŸŽ† is just an add-on, not an integral part of the festivities, 4th of July/ 1st of July {if you are a Canadian} has ๐ŸŽ‡ but not necessarily sweets)

During my childhood, Diwali was celebrated by a handful of families in the building in an extravagant manner.

One family in particular would buy thousands of rupees worth of firecrackers and light them up late at night over the period of 5 days during which Diwali was celebrated….

This was the highlight for the rest of us kids.

As the child in the family grew up, the parents started to wean him off from spending ๐Ÿ’ธ on things which would literally….Turn into ashes in a matter of minutes.

Now the way his parents convinced him was really something….๐Ÿ˜…

They told him and I quote

The Smoke from the firecrackers kill mosquitoes, so by default we are killing living things. Hence no more fireworks it’s time to Go Green”

As I listened to this justification, ๐Ÿ‘‡was my reaction

So what ended up happening was no more firecrackers, no more light shows…and a very grateful species of insects I guess….๐Ÿ˜…

So when he removed the major light component from the “Festival of light”

(Diyas were still there….)

I replaced it with something much more cooler….

Yup…Glowsticks. ๐ŸŒŸ

Since Halloween always came before Diwali, I would tell Broseph to send a few Glowstick packs ahead of time in a package or with any of his friends who were coming to India to visit their family during Diwali.

It was a huge hit among my friends since Glowsticks came in different varieties and colors….

My personal favorite was the Green Glowing Necklace

Its been a couple of years since I last celebrated Diwali, so this year in the spirit of Diwali,

P.S. It doesn’t come anywhere near the fresh variant but when in a foreign country you take what you get ๐Ÿ˜… (whilst thinking frugally)

That being said, to everyone who is celebrating Diwali this year.

Have a Safe and …

Marriage?! Is it a necessity or just a convention of society…. — October 27, 2018

Marriage?! Is it a necessity or just a convention of society….

As you all know “Wedding season” has commenced in India…

As of right now, individuals are just getting engaged and they will get around 2-3 months to hang out and get to know each other before they get hitched during the months of December-January-February…

(perfect time for an outdoor lawn wedding reception and it’s also during the Misery season)

P.S. Reference in an earlier post….

Now in India, most things in life are expected to follow a linear pattern…

Birth… Education….Get a job….Get married…Have kids…Take care of kids and their needs… Retire from Job…Live out the rest of your life…Death

So it is only natural that there would be some uproar when some one decides to break convention…..

Case in point Broseph….

Although western influence played a major part in his case..I too believe that it is about time that we forgo our Orthodox traditions and think of marriage in a novel sense.

Traditions and customs were put in place at a certain point in time for people who were living in that time period…

Times changed, People changed but traditions/customs weren’t revised…

Marriage is a sacred bond…. I get that but I believe that somewhere down the line people have lost its significance.

Marriage is the start of a new chapter in an individual’s life and not something that should be checked off without being physically, mentally and emotionally prepared for well in advance.

Marriage is about sharing your life with another individual and making certain compromises along the way.

It is a huge commitment and so it is important to try to get to know the person with whom you are about to undertake said commitment with….

There was an interesting post recently saying that Millenials and generation X people were killing marriage…

I would instead say that they found a way out of a possibly messy situation…

Lemme elaborate….

When you get married, if you happen to get divorced…(which is happening in abundance lately)

1) You are labelled as a divorcee (be it a man or woman)

2) If you are a guy, in most cases you will have to dish out alimony

3) If you happen to have a kid before you get divorced then you have to pay alimony as well as child support. ๐Ÿ’ธ

4) If you try to remarry, people look at you with a certain level of prejudice.

I have seen people who have gotten engaged, lived together, had kids, raised them up as a family and then somewhere down the line ended up getting officially married….(just for the sake of formality)

In this case, the “live in relationship” was a form of beta testing for the marriage….but for that to happen both the individuals as well as the respective families must be onboard…

This requires a lot of open minded thinking…which I’m sorry to say is severely lacking in India….

Then people come to India’s defense by saying that at least you guys have long lasting marriages and fewer divorces….

And to that I say…

True….There are some couples who are happy but the rest are just “pretending” to be happy because like I said before; in India there is a lot of importance put on what society thinks about you….

I have seen families wherein they look like the ‘ideal couple’ in a social setting but talk to each one individually and you can see the darkness lying deep within….

Marriage is in no way a necessity.

The main thing to remember is Marry when you are ready, not when you are lonely (Same thing can be said about Falling in Love)

If you want that…

You need to invest your time and other resources in trying to ensure that your life partner is the best fit for you and get to know as much about them as possible to avoid any surprises later on…

Do they want to have kids/not?

What are their vices? And are you okay with it?

And also the below the belt stuff too ๐Ÿคญ

(Coz apparently in some cases that can be a deal breaker….)

I know I’m overthinking this but I have seen people get married for the wrong reasons only to get divorced soon after….

You know you are ready to get married when your thought process is along these lines…

That’s all for now…..

The Good doctor.. Latest episode…Breakdown — October 20, 2018

The Good doctor.. Latest episode…Breakdown

************Spoiler Warning***********

First of all, lemme just say that this is a really good show…..

You get a bit of medical sciences and a bit of drama….Not a like another show of the same genre….

(No hate for Grey’s anatomy, watched it,loved it but too much of ๐Ÿ’” and ๐Ÿ˜ญ moments)


So in this episode there were 3 plot points in total:-

“Special child” and parent scene

Now this part was a real ๐Ÿ˜ข because you can sympathize with both parties…

The boy has certain needs which the mother can’t handle on her own after the father bailed out on them and the boy can’t control the way he reacts to certain situations… He would like to do so but as of right now, he’s helpless.

So after some trials and tribulations, the Mom decided it would be in the best interest of the child to be put under the care of an expert…

Later, in the episode we see Dr. Melendez visiting his sister who is also “special” and that makes us viewers understand why he was so hesitant of the mother’s decision in the first place.

Glassman and his daughter from the great beyond…

Now this part, reminded me of that one dream that I had of “Daughter- lirious” (name change)

(taking a page from one of my favorite YouTubers)

Glassman and his daughter Maddie had a good relationship when she was a kid…..

After his wife passed away, Glassman was more focused on his work to make sure that his daughter had all the facilities that he didn’t have growing up (a classic parent line)

Maddie didn’t see it that way though, she felt like after her mom had passed away, her Dad didn’t care for her, so see sought refuge in someone or should I say something else…

Now I do not condone her actions. However, I do believe that Glassman threw himself into his work because he was unable to handle his teenage daughter and working overtime was a means of escape…(struggles of being a single parent to a teenage daughter, i suppose).

Glassman knew of his daughter’s habit of getting high and since he was a neuro-surgeon I’m guessing the arguments were heated and maybe he warned her not to keep up with the habit and like any another teenage Maddie rebeled and did the exact opposite…

One day, Glassman had enough and he locked her out of the house, (I’m guessing work-stress and defiance at home just broke the dam)


Glassman must have hoped that Maddie would go to her aunt or friend’s place to crash but from how the episode ended I feel like she sought solace in her other “friend” ๐Ÿ‘†and died from an overdose….

I’m glad that my dream scenario didn’t have that ending but then again after being put on the spot I didn’t getting a…

for my dream.

So I’m hoping things didn’t take a turn for the worse because I did give “Daughter- lirious” assurance that whatever happens know that we (me and wife-lirious) would always be there for her…..

And I’m hoping that assurance was good enough….

I don’t know if it’s a coincidence but this episode came right around…

Maybe there was a hidden message in there somewhere…

The Shawn and Lea story….

Now after what happened in the last season, Shawn unleashed all of his pent up anger onto Lea in the initial episodes of this season.

He felt a bit better but at the end of the last episode, Lea gave Shawn a piece of her mind as well; letting him know that although Shawn may have been in pain, when things didn’t work out for her in Hershey, she expected Shawn to be there to get her through the hard time and comfort her in her time of need….

So at this juncture, a question comes to mind to which i don’t quite know the answer to…

When it comes to caring for someone where does one person’s responsibility end and another’s begin?!

Lea cared for Shawn and vice versa but when she just decided to up and leave him with out any foreshadowing, it is understandable that Shawn would feel ‘abandoned’.

In the previous episode, Lea flips the guilt on Shawn saying that he should have been there for her when she needed him the most….

After the guilt trip, Shawn tries to make things right with Lea….which does go as expected ๐Ÿ™ˆ

Now since I love making connections of plot points to real life scenarios, I connected the Shawn and Lea conundrum to the dented state of affairs between Angelica and Me.

Now when things in life don’t go according to plan/expectations you tend to get stuck in the doldrums and at that moment anything minor can set you off…..

Now that minor thing for me was ‘feeling like I was being taken for granted’. I don’t know if it’s intentional or not but that’s how Angelica has been making me feel from our past couple of interactions…

Now it’s like they say…


Now you never know, some day if Angelica and me hash all this mess out, she might have a different take on it because she’s the hero in her own story and I’m the big ol’ baddie there….

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If I were to imagine she would blame me for taking things to heart and cite a scenario where I wasn’t there for her…..

Now that is a classic human behaviour, we always tend to gloss over things that people do for us and highlight that one thing that one time that someone didn’t do.

So right now since hashing things out seems like a pipe dream, I think giving each other some space is the right move on my part….


Coming back to the show, I’m more partial towards Shawn because when Shawn was falling for Lea, she could have made it clear that she was just looking for a friend and not lead him on.

Now that would suck for Shawn but he could dissuade himself from developing further feelings for someone who doesn’t see him in the same light… The same thing happened to me not too long ago but hey such is life…

This is only episode 4 so I don’t know how how their story and maybe by the end it will be clear whether Lea’s views Shawn…

as a Kid



as a Man


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Elementary, my dear friends!!! ๐Ÿง — October 6, 2018

Elementary, my dear friends!!! ๐Ÿง

For as long as I can remember, I have been a huge fan of detective shows ….

When I was small I used a watch a show on the telly called…

This was a Detective show in Hindi.

But as I grew up, I realised that although the cases were legit; sometimes the show got a big cheesy…

Then I came across a plethora of English detective shows like….

Note: Some of them might not be full fledged detective shows but had some investigation plots built into it…

So when my friend posted a picture of a mysterious scenic location with a caption….

Don’t ask me, I’m not telling ๐Ÿ˜Ž

I felt like the gauntlet had been thrown down and so I decided that….

So I started to analyze the picture carefully…

After seeing all the greenery in the picture, a foreign location could be easily ruled out….

But that wasn’t that big of a victory since India is a pretty big place and most of the places have such scenic views as you go away into the wilderness….

So I had to focus on the hills/mountains ๐Ÿง

In most of her picture this strangely pointed mountain/hill was way too common and so I knew it was a lake and mountain combo…

The more I looked into it, I could see familiar terrains in the pics in Google images which was my best source to figure out the location…

Finally I concluded the “investigation” by stating that the location was indeed in Kerala near a place called Wayanad….

(The girl has family in both Kerala and Goa and this terrain doesn’t remind me of Goa at all; it’s too green ๐Ÿ˜…)

And in order to set my mind at ease I ended up also stating that she was housed at a place called

Wayanad Silverwoods resort

P.S. Not sponsored ๐Ÿคฃ

Based on this image

I feel like the mountains in this ๐Ÿ‘† picture are in continuation to the above source picture…

Now my friend can deny or accept if my assumption has hit the nail on the head or not but I’m satisfied with my findings and if one day she decides to reveal the location i can compare and see how close I was and if my deductions were accurate….

So for now all I can say is …

Dinner Buffet at a Sushi place (Poetry edition) — September 30, 2018

Dinner Buffet at a Sushi place (Poetry edition)

Off we went to a Sushi place ๐Ÿฃ

You can presume by the title that we definitely were gonna stuff our face…๐Ÿ˜‰

This time it was Broseph’s treat ๐Ÿ˜œ

He said beforehand that we should have some veggies in order to balance out the meat….๐Ÿฅฆ๐Ÿ„๐ŸŒฐ๐Ÿฅ’

Reached the restaurant by quarter to six ๐Ÿ••

The hostess came to our table and handed us both a fork and a pair of wooden chopsticks…..

The “raw fish” category on th menu had sushi, sashimi and hand-roll. ๐Ÿฃ

Broseph was eager to eat them all bowl after bowl….๐Ÿ˜‹

After getting peer pressured into eating fresh oysters a few weeks back

I told Broseph I’m gonna sit out on the marine-life attack….๐Ÿฝ๏ธ ๐ŸŸ

Now I was stuck in a huge dilemma

Then it hit me….

Their menu also had beef ๐Ÿฎ and pork ๐Ÿท

All of the items that I would have to eat with a fork….

After having found a way around by not eating raw fish

I was glad that by the end of the meal, I had sampled each and every other dish….๐Ÿ˜˜

After consuming the food, it was time to have something sweet

The Neapolitan and Green tea ice cream turned out to be quite the treat….๐Ÿจ

Thus the night ended with our bellies full and our spirits high

And so now I can conclude this post by saying….

Wallowing in Self pity & Seeking Endorphins — September 29, 2018

Wallowing in Self pity & Seeking Endorphins

I have always believed in the saying “Comparison is the mother of all problems”

But sometimes you just can’t seem to follow your own advice….

When I was a student, I hated with a burning passion, the times when Dad would compare my grades with that of my peers…

If he did the comparison each and every time, I wouldn’t have been that pissed off about it but he would only compare when I wouldn’t perform well…

Tell me about it ๐Ÿ˜•

If he would have made the comparisons in both instances then I would feel elated in most cases…

And a bit depressed in the few other instances.

But he along with most parents have this flawed ideology that “you should only make comparisons when your “offspring” doesn’t perform upto his full potential…”

And for me that’s nothing more than a huge pile of ….

I understand that they are doing this by keeping our best interests at heart but it’s like they say…

So what was that introductory story for ?

Well let’s just say I followed in my Dad’s footsteps and I have also started making comparisons but in this case the victim is also me…

Lemme elaborate…๐Ÿง

When you are in your job hunt phase and things aren’t going according to plan…you feel ๐Ÿ˜ž

And then when you see on LinkedIn and other such places that your peers are getting job offers…you end up feeling more ๐Ÿ˜ฉ

A similar analogy would be…

What I’m trying to say is just because I haven’t secured a job as of right now inspite of sending out countless applications I’m comparing this phase of my life to that of my peers and…. Wallowing in Self pity…

I think this is what they mean by being stuck in the “doldrums”

In order to prevent it from getting to me I tried a lot of remedies….

Tried singing…..

But couldn’t get a good session going so gave up on that…..

Then I tried cooking…and that helped out a bit…

Baked Sole sandwich…looks horrifying but it was ๐Ÿ˜‹.

Spoke to parents and close confidants and that helped out a bunch…..

Teachers back in Toronto weren’t kidding when they said that “Job hunt is gonna test your patience and perseverance to the limit”

Right now I need to make sure that I don’t break apart…. I need to push on through and focus on the positive aspects of my life and try not to get bogged down by the accomplishments of others….

I shouldn’t compare my behind the scenes with someone else’s highlight reel…

Easier said than done but working on it piece by piece….better late than never…..

In other news…. Really excited about watching a Flick at the theatre in the next couple of weeks…


Plus it is that time of the year again…

And the first person to enter the fray is one of my lab friends from the engineering days…

A message to her future husband…

Today was also Angelica’s birthday….

That’s about it for this post….

Selfless Love – Is it possible in this day and age? — September 21, 2018

Selfless Love – Is it possible in this day and age?

First of all what is Selfless Love???

“Selfless love is the capacity to care enough to be able to place the well being, security, and happiness of another human being first even before our own”.

Selfless Love is the purest form of love. It is the kind of love that most mother’s have for their children but the question of the day is…

Whether it is possible to have that same kind of love for your partner (girlfriend or boyfriend?)

It sounds good in theory but is it practical?!

I believe there are two main factors that dampens selfless love.. viz

When you love someone selflessly you initally do things for them because making them happy offers you some sort of happiness in return.

However, since we are humans. at the end of the day after sometime we unknowingly start expecting that similar kind of “courtesy“.

Meanwhile the person who you did the deeds for doesn’t have a clue about what is festering in your mind.

They fail to realize that this is a big deal for you but you expect them to psychically know what you are going through and respond accordingly….

Yet, we have all done it at some point in our lives….

One instance that I vividly remember is…. (Case of sibling-selfless love)

A couple of years ago Angelica was supposed to give an exam. Now the study materials required her to spend around 700 bucks….

Since she was abroad and didn’t have that much ๐Ÿ’ต she would go to her library everyday which was like a 45 min ride from her place, just to read up on the materials.

Now I’m very much protective of Angelica as she is someone who I consider as “one of my own

Since I was more into technology than most of my family members, I spent hours browsing online for the study materials and finally I found it but it was fragmented…and you could only download a fragment every 4 hours….8 fragments later, I had to compile and then extract the files….

When it was all said and done…I had the 700 bucks worth of study material with me…for free

When Angelica came online, I told her how i got the materials and then gave it to her. She downloaded the materials, thanked me and that was it…

The story should have ended there but in my mind that “thank you” didn’t match the effort that went into procuring the files….

So I ended up putting the favor on her tab….

Kind of like an…

Or an UOME ๐Ÿ˜

Whenever I needed her help or needed her to do something for me I expected her to put in the same effort….

Time passed and at every instant where Angelica could have done something, she took the easy way out/or avoided it all together….

Now I couldn’t stay mad at her and I couldn’t hold a grudge since she was “family” even though some part of me really wanted to…

So I ended up drawing a line in the sand to prevent myself from going over and beyond when it came to Angelica.

So what I’m trying to say in a way is that you can’t love someone selflessly if you are keeping tabs on them…coz if that’s the case then even a slight bit of negligence or ignorance from them will end up hurting you deeply….

Now coming to the second reason…

Even if you claim that you have no/low expectations so you never keep tabs on anyone, fear is something that you just can’t run away from….for long.

Most of us are afraid of being left high and dry…

Case in point…

Girls have a fear of putting themselves out there โค๏ธ… Coz they have a fear that most guys will hook up with them and then leave them out to dry…๐Ÿ’”

Guys also have similar kind of a fear but it has got a lil twist to it, they are afraid that after aforementioned hookup…the girl will be like…


And then leave them out to dry…..

And the funny thing is that in most cases that is exactly what ends up happening….

You will rarely find a scenario where the guy and girl are really into each other and not just in the relationship for the “carnal” pleasures…

So even if the magic doesn’t happen in the first couple of instances..

They will ride out the tough period coz although carnal pleasures are an important part of a relationship it is still at the end of the day just a part of the relationship.

But only individuals who know what it is like to be alone even with people around them can truly fathom the idea of “Selfless love”.

Love…. You can easily fall into it but what people fail to realize is that you can just as easily fall out of it…

But as long as you are willing to put effort into the relationship then things will turn out okay…

So coming back to the title Selfless Love – Is it possible in this day and age?

I believe that it is very much possible but it is gonna take a lot of effort and a lot of patience…

But the end product will be that much more precious…

Even as you grow older you will be in sync with each other and will have less insecurities in your relationship.

In other news… after a brief hiatus Kristen has gotten back to her usual posts on social media….

And all I have got to say is…

That level of confidence…..

Now when one of my friends heard about this…she expressed her desire to buy some “scantily clad outfits” in the future….with her girl bestie.

When I heard about it I was confused…

Although it is a good idea to buy said items with your bestie, it is far more beneficial if you buy it with the person for whom said material is in a way intended for….

At least that way you can better understand the taste and preferences of the individual (if that is your intention to begin with)

They could have a myriad of responses to your choices… Viz.

How do I know this?

Well after watching a bunch of anime…๐Ÿ˜… you get a bit of a handle on such peculiar situations….

Let’s leave it at that..

In food related news I’m getting my Bake on….

425 degrees Fahrenheit for 30 minutes is also a good temperature for baking “frozen veggies”

Pizza is something that I can definitely scratch out from my take out options coz ๐Ÿ‘†was

Dinner needed a bit of a rework..

1) Need to cut fries into thicker wedges and uniformly

2) 400 degrees and not 425 for 45 minutes should do the trick…. Low Temperature Long Time

3) Stab meat to get the marinade into it and ginger garlic paste is quintessential for that extra….

Continuous improvement is the name of the game.

Well that’s it for today’s post…